see ya later christian

I just read about Christian Lacroix's final show before his haute couture house is shut down and it makes me feel very sad to see him go. I am not a Lacroix fanatic, but I gained appreciation of his work after seeing an exhibit of his clothes at the Ayala Museum some years back. The craftmanship is superb, and the recurring theme of saints and saintly garb actually appeals to me -- to both the good Catholic girl side and the Goth side. I do hope he gets a new lease on a career in the fashion industry. God knows if Isaac Mizrahi can be given a second chance, Christian deserves one (or two, or three) too.

drug-addled

When Karl and I met, neither of us had a coffee habit. After spending three years in an office with free coffee, I now find myself wanting a dose to force my drooping eyelids to open. Meanwhile, Karl is beginning to purchase coffee-based drinks when all he used to want in CBTL was weak tea or sugary shakes.

Note, however, that I don't particularly think caffeine makes me effective. Right now I am hopped up on the substance but can't write for shit. I feel awake but fidgety. I hope Karl never gets to this point.

a note to parents

Remember that if you intend to teach your daughters to be self-sufficient, DON'T act like you wish a white knight would rescue them, and that a marriage to anyone less than a white knight is not worth entering.

a new signature

For years I've been fixated on buying only things that make a big statement, but for several months now, I've been more interested in acquiring quiet pieces that can be a meaningful signature.

One item I was hunting for in particular was a simple chain necklace with a small pendant that nestles at the base of the throat. Everywhere that I looked, though, I couldn't find anything that meant something to me. Necklaces were either too loud or cutesy. This is not too surprising -- I've been writing it repeatedly at work: recent jewelry trends are for bold pieces.

Eventually, I ended up searching my jewelry box. I found the ankh pendant that Karl gave me when we just got together and suddenly it seemed like the perfect thing to have. I never took to wearing it because I felt like it was a remnant of my old fascination with hippies and goth kids -- something I thought I already put behind me. But of course, you probably never outgrow the things that you take a liking to during your early teens. They're too formative a period. I'll always like looking a bit bohemian or gothic when dressing up.

More importantly, I put on the pendant at a time that Karl and I had some serious drama. When I wore it, I felt the new love he had for me then, how beautiful he made me feel whenever we were together. I needed that feeling at that moment, when I thought he would never make me feel that way again. The great thing about it, though, was that he made a point of noticing my wearing it. He said it in a way that seemed to me, that he knew why this was meaningful to me. And maybe to him too.